“MESSY” JOURNEY

He told the driver to stop and he bought, He invited me to join him, but I gave him the conventional response; ‘No Thanks’.

He ate it one after the other and took a pause after every finger.

What was he eating?
Banana and Sprite. What a combo!
After a while he released a terrific smell that is capable of terminating the life of a newborn. Shezuuuuus!

I nor fit complain. I just kept my nose by the window of the car, as if to seem like I was meditating on the trees that we drove past. I gasped for air!

After each silent insidious fart, he go lock up, face front like say he dey focus on the journey. O lorrrrrrrd.
And this guy was sitting next to me. I almost passed out.

We were three who sat at the extreme of the Sienna car and this guy was in our middle, doing great harm to two innocent ladies like us.
I on his left, the other lady on his right and he in the middle like Christ, giving both of us a merciless crucifixion.
The other lady beside him was fast asleep, I don’t know how she managed to sleep in such a disastrous condition. She was even snoring… O lord! She’s a gunner!

There I was alone, struggling for survival like a kid drowning in the river. I was gasping for air – Fresh unpolluted air. Holy Moses!
But no way! I was literally doomed! Because the journey was gonna last for the next four hours. …
And in this very trying moment of my life, it seemed as if the clock remained stagnant because the time became so slow…

This guy continued, he even transited to another realm, and this time he was sleeping-farting. I just kept staring at him, i was almost in tears. I held my peace, and kept my nostrils fixed on the window. My neck was already aching from sticking to one particular direction but I condoned.

I’m too decent to give him the insult of his life; so I chose endurance!

Plugged in my earphones to ameliorate my situation with some good music, but hell no!
The odor surpassed the sound playing in my ears. The smell was overwhelming – His ‘mess’ had a mixture of both dawa-dawa (locust beans) and the poisonous sniper. It was more than a suicide bomb.

I wish I could simply disappear!

Gradually, Minutes past, hours followed, and finally we arrived our destination. The car didn’t have to halt and pullover before I stood myself up, ready to jump out of the world of DISASTROUS-DOOM emanating from a HIDEOUS and POISONOUS-FART; to a world of FREEDOM.

Once again I felt like Mandela, Freedom! Freedom! Freedom! Thus I screamed!

NONFICTION
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