My Flatmate and I…

 

I currently share a flat with this girl, an amazing personality, but there’s a tiny bugbear!

We both do our individual cleanups, but there are times when if I find her unclean dishes in the sink I wash them alongside mine.

It is just the both of us living in the apartment, and for me, it’s no big deal to wash someone’s dish if I find them in the sink while washing mine. 

But for this girl, apparently, it is the opposite. No matter how many times I’ve washed her dish, she has never for once washed mine if she finds it in the sink. Even if it is just a spoon. She’ll move it to one side and wash hers only. 

P.S I don’t deliberately leave my unwashed dish in the sink, except when I’m in haste.

This has been a concern. I know say nobody send me to wash for her, but I can’t just see her dish while washing, and ignore it. I’ve tried to, but I couldn’t! My conscience wouldn’t let me! 

Part of me feels like I should stop, even though I don’t see a big deal in carrying on, but deep down I wish the gestures can be reciprocated, even if it’s once in a while. But she just wouldn’t. 

I don’t want to speak to her about this, because I believe that kindness should be natural and not forced.

But I worry that if I continue doing this it may just become normalized and taken for granted without ever being reciprocated.

If you were in my position what would you do? 

******

TAKEAWAY:

Just like this Flatmate of mine, this is how many friendships, relationships, and even marriages,  are. One person does the most, hoping and praying that one day they’ll be treated the same way. Such one-sided relationships can be draining and exhausting! 

Life is sweeter when we get the same amount of love that we give. 

It is okay to want to be loved the same way you love. It is human to expect reciprocity. 

Love is not just loving, love is also being loved. 

Love is not only giving, love is also receiving!

You scratch my back, I scratch your back.

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